Damn Coyote

Dear Miss Lilly,

HOLY SHIT!! That Damn Coyote came out of the long grass only 6ft away from us this morning. Felt close enough to touch. I admire your calmness I’m still shaking. Again you made an attempt to ward him off however based on his snapping and growling he looked very hungry and was not deterred. Steph Brown you are correct there are better things to do with my phone than take pictures. Would have been an amazing picture… but I tried music this morning unfortunately it did not deter. He was very intent on gaining what little ground was between us and had no fear.

Unfortunately as this is now our 3rd close encounter with him Lilly you were not quite as focused on your barking this morning. I wanted to reinforce for you the following: 1. he is not another dog to play with 2. if he reaches you he will bite you and you’ll be fighting for your life 3. I will be helpless to help.In light of this please be advised that poop bags are now on the shopping list and we will be taking alternative routes on our morning walks. (Jessica Beldner-Lewis if there is anything else to add to the list please advise.) I’m sorry for this as I know you so enjoy the long grass but you are no longer chasing rabbits from this grass. They’ve probably all been eaten.Sincerely,

 Your Hunted Walker.

Sneeking Coyote

Dear Miss Lilly,

I have been remiss in thanking you for last week. It was quite startling to find a Coyote trotting behind us during our morning walk and contrary to Don Woodbury’s advise you do NOT run away as that just makes him run towards us faster. After I turned and yelled at him and you kindly engaged in our defence it caused him to stop and hide in the grass. Your increased agitation and loud barking held him at bay so we could walk backwards down the road and to the house.

You have my unwavering permission to use all your vocal strength in our defence should this happen again. Just please mind the leash, should it break at your tension I don’t know that I could break up a Coyote / Lilly fight. I appreciate you were by my side. Thank you.

Yours,

Scared Shitless Walker

 

 

Sunny Days

Dear Miss Lilly,

I agree it is exciting that it is finally warm in Calgary. Car rides when the sun is shining are so much fun. I would like to continue offering to put the window down for your maximum enjoyment however your slobber on the door frame is proving impossible to scrub off. Please keep your mouth closed. Thank you.

Yours,
Super Scrubber

 

Training

Dear Miss Lilly,

As Darlene Blackett has found you could be quite trainable. Please review this video so you can appreciate your capabilities and the reasonableness of my requests.

Once again this morning I was tempted to let go of the leash when at it maximum tension while you were chasing the rabbit. If I wasn’t trying to increase my step count I would have. Lets continue to try harder around the training.

Your Walker.

Manic Mopping

Dear Miss Lilly,

I recognize when its been raining 5 days straight it puts a damper on your outdoor time. Sorry for that and thank you for limiting your requests.

Unfortunately, if you continue to dig holes in the backyard and not wipe your feet upon coming in there will be consequences. We will no longer consider Don’s automatic dog door solution and your time will now be supervised. We would like to respect your independence however I refuse to mop the kitchen more than once a day.

Yours, Manic Mopper.

 

Toys go in the Basket

Dear Miss Lilly,

As children grow up they learn how they fit into the day to day of family life. They become more independent and responsible for themselves and their things. I recognize we have failed to help you as we have Aaron and Sabine understand and develop. So let me catch up.

Over the last 24hrs I have picked up and put away these 2 toys over 6 times. I don’t know how that’s possible with you spending so many of those hours lounging in the sun. I know you know where they belong and how to get them in and out of the basket. I would appreciate you trying harder in this regard.

Thank you.
Your Aging Caregiver.

 

 

Dear Lilly,
I regret to inform you that you can not catch the rabbits. In order for our relationship to continue please stop trying as walking you has become quite a challenge. Thank you.

Your Walker.